A Craigslist Cry for Help

Editor’s Note: This was an actual ad posted on Craigslist.org in mid-September in New Mexico. I first learned of this ad while browsing the Jehovah’s Witness Recovery Forum. I went to the Albuquerque Craigslist and verified the existence of the ad in the “Talent Gigs” subsection. The ad has since been flagged and removed – probably because of complaints by some JWs who don’t have a sense of humor. Thanks to a forum member [So past a dub] the ad was copied in its entirety and posted for others to enjoy. I’m sure that you will agree that this is a classic bit of humor and will enjoy it as much as I did. Sorry to say, I was unable to identify the original author before the ad was deleted.


Actor Wanted to Cheer up Depressed Jehovah’s Witness

As strange as it may sound, even the people who always tell you at your doorstep to “have a nice day” sometimes get depressed, especially from the many arrogant and rude people they end up talking to. I’m in a serious funk because I’ve been knocking on doors now for over 30 years and the end of the world hasn’t come and I just can’t push myself any longer to knock on doors. Depressed writer Truman Capote [public domain]For other religions this wouldn’t be a problem but with Jehovah’s Witnesses, you get kicked out, shunned by your relatives and friends, along with getting a death sentence from God. So, I have no choice but to get over this and this is why I want to hire an actor to help me out.

I’m looking to hire an actor for a one day contract gig. I would prefer a male actor, who is short and pudgy but if you have a chin like Jay Leno that would be a big plus. I do not want to meet you prior to the role you will play at my doorstep. It is very important that your role be played realistically. The entire scenes will be recorded by cameras both in the hallway and in my apartment. Here are the details of the 3 acting scenes. Please read this carefully and give me a bid for your services that includes the props (I will send the magazines to you in advance):

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